Do you ever hear from your internal naysayer? He’ll tell you things are too good, you don’t deserve XYZ, that you won’t win, that you’re destined to lose, that the people you’re with don’t really like you, that they can’t like you, that other people are supposed to be happy, but not you. Oh no, not you. Well, I’ve been hearing a lot from that guy, and I’ve just about had it.
I don’t think I’m alone in this. Examples:
On a bike I’m very fit and very skilled, yet my confidence waivers. It’s like, I have permission to enjoy riding at a certain level, and I can help everyone else excel, but I can’t let myself be as great as I can be. Every time I’m in a start gate, or riding with the “cool kids,” I regress back to the 11-year-old fat kid who got sent away and locked in a Catholic military boarding school. My dad said it a hundred times: “What you want and what you get are two different things.” Not only am I somehow unable to be a good as everyone else, but — more importantly — I don’t DESERVE to be as good.
Or say your friends and business associates want to spend time with you. They want to work with you. They want to do great things with you. That voice tells you forget it, it’ll never happen, these guys will figure out what a goofball you are.
Or you meet someone extraordinary. He/she sees something in you that you can’t fully believe. You feel so excited yet so grounded. Cosmic style. You feel yourself falling into a new place. It feels great and powerful and empowering. The naysayer: She’s too beautiful for you. She’s too accomplished. Too dynamic. Too cool. There’s no way she’ll stick with you.
I always thought that asking for what you want and enjoying what you have are selfish and evil. But you know what? I’m starting to realize that living close to our hearts is the way it’s supposed to be. The more love we accept, the more we share, the more love there is. When something great happens and the naysayer kicks in, how very uncool. Are you going to listen to that guy? Are you going to let him sabotage you?
Starting right now this minute, when that voice comes up I’m gonna tell him:
Hey man, I understand your pain. I get where you’re coming from. But we’re not there any more. We are strong and capable and we have support. And everything is going to be fine. [I just lost it.]
For whatever reason, God or The Universe has decided to give us all this awesome stuff. Who are we to second guess that? Things are what they’re supposed to be. They’re great. Let’s accept it. And let’s rock it.