Big Life Changes
My wife Tracy and I have been together for 13 years — married for 11 — and we’ve decided to move on. I still can’t believe this is happening. So sad, so tragic. Yet hopefully better for everyone in the long run. I guess. I hope.
Lots of changes: selling the house (and leveling the pump track), looking at jobs, considering a move from Boulder, living as a singular entity. With the cornerstone of my entire adult life removed, it’s all up in the air.
Heavy. Forgive me if I fall behind on this site. I’ll do my best to rock the bike love, but Life has others things in store right now.
Lee – Sorry to hear this. Is there no way to reconcile your differences? Have you guys been through counseling? I hate to see so many marriages dissolve nowadays. You guys got enough fight left in ya to save this?
Will keep you in my prayers..
Damn man, that sucks to hear!!!! I trust you will come through this with flying colors as you have made friends all over that are willing to help. But it is never easy. Good luck man and you have plenty of guys cheering for you!! And again, sorry to hear.
Hey dude, I wish you a Merry Christmas despite your hardship; I’m prayin for ya!
Thanks you guys. We’ve done everything we could: counseling and beyond. I DO NOT want to be divorced!
I think it’s time for us to honor ourselves (and each other), and pursue our paths.
That sounds so cheesy, but that’s what it comes down to. No blaming — just aceepting what is, then acting on our values.
I guess. This is way scarier than any DH run!!!
Lee, so sorry to hear this. Some times thing like this are just inevitable. After 13 years it has to be hard on ya. especialy this time of year. Me being in the service I know what its like to be away from your family but nothing like this. I pray to God that everything will workout for the best for the both you and your wife. God bless
Yo Lee..
I have been there and it is a very low point. Things will get better.
Time to get selfish and concetrate on healing yourself.
Try to avoid contact as it will only make things worse.
Keep your chin up.
j
Sorry to hear that.
My best advice is to keep on ridin’. I know if helps me out.
Good luck with whatever you decide to pursue, and I hope you have a happy holiday despite your losses.
Oh jeez, it always sucks to hear these things. I guess you could say that they happen for a reason…I guess that means more time for riding and dilly dallying. Despite all this, I know quite a few people including myself who know you are larger than life. Good luck and happy holidays. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Lee
Sorry to hear the news. You’re the second person in two days that told me he was getting a divorce / separated. You always have the answers to our bike questions and problems. I wish we had an answer for you now….. You and Tracy will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Kevin
Damn… I’m very sorry to hear this sad news.
Brent
keep in touch and come visit for a stay anytime.
Lee,
Words don’t really help at a time like this. I wish you both the best.
Scott
Hey Lee, really sorry to hear that, specially this time of the year. but i’m sure u got pretty good friends that will help u out of this one…and remember to apply ur riding kung fu to life man!
cheers
Lee, sorry to hear about this Its a hard descision to make even if it is for the best, I have been there. So many people go through life unhappy and its just not worth it life is to short. Things will get better for both of you keep your head up and stay busy.
Thanks everyone.
Lee, so sorry to hear this news. I’m sure you’ve done all you can and it sounds like you are being very graceful about the situation. Keep your chin up buddy, I have no doubts that you will get through this.
Lee, that really scuks.
But if it’s for the best, it is what it is. We’re pulling for you.
Keep the good attitude, and be true to yourself through everything.
Lee, don’t worry about the site, mate. We will be here regardless. I offer one bit of consolation: everyone I know who has gone through separation ended up in a better situation, be it back together or separated. It was hell at first, but after time, things turn out well. I hope you both keep well.
Lee, I’ve been there brother and I feel for you. Only time heals this kind of wound; just a word of encouragement, my ex and I are still friends after 14 years of marriage and 12 years beyond. I hope you and Tracy can remain on good terms.
Believe it or not, mountainbiking is the one thing that has been the saving grace for me over the years, and you’ve contributed to that. Thanks.
You take care of yourself.
Praying for you, Lee, in your difficult time. Best wishes.
Hey Lee, I am very sorry to hear about your and Tracy. Just know all of your local friends are here for support, rides, and whatever you need. Hopefully you are free one day soon and we can go shred some turns, ski style.
Yo dude, I’m praying for you. I still have that room too if you need it.
Zach
That’s terrible man. hang in there and I hope the new year brings you new hope and happiness.
Lee-
I believe you have amazing drive and can overcome this obstacle, you’ve ridden through worse. We all know the same way home.
All the best man, keep your head up. You are my idol with all your adventures. If you need a place to crash in San Diego (and reimburse with a pump track) let me know…we can hit some moto too…Have a good Holiday and ride.
Sorry to hear this Lee. Just curious, does this happen to have anything to do with your love of bikes? All my family and friends think a 35 year old like myself needs to grow up and stop playing with bikes. They think it is silly and always harass me about having 5 bikes and wanting to ride all the time. The pump track I’m building has got a lot of interesting comments from family members. I brush it off, but I guess I could see how a wife or girlfriend could see it has childish. Its a shame really, because if more ADULTS continued biking into the adult life, I think we’d have a lot fewer problems in the world.
That’s a great question. WhileTracy says she’s proud of what I’ve accomplished in bikes, for most of our relationship she’s been waiting for me to grow up and use my intelligence for “more important things.”
It all comes down to values. Back when Clinton was president, he came to the city where I worked at a newspaper. The editors wanted someone to interview him while he did his morning run. I was the fittest person there, so they asked me.
When I told my wife, she was super excited. “You’re going to run with the President!” But then I told her I’d already committed to a huge group mountain bike ride that day, and that I’d declined the opportunity. She was not stoked. I explained: I committed to my friends, and that means more to me than meeting the president. With great disappointment, she shook her head and said, “You’re just not interested in making it Big Time.”
Ten years later, I have a signed letter from President Bush thanking me for the book I gave him. I also have my name on a Pulitzer Prize. And I have a thriving business doing things my way — with three great companies who want to hire me if I decide I need something more stable. I guess it’s not Big Time, but it’s working for me.
A lot of people look at our bike stuff as silly, but I see it as a product of personal values. Values like committment, community, friendship, vitality and passion. If those values work for you, I say rock ’em.
My wife now understands where I’m coming from and where I want to go. Unfortunately, that’s not her path. I guess we all have to live by our values — and hopefully find people who share them.
I hope you know that you are “Big Time” to your friends and fans. I’m sorry to hear about this trying time in your life. Those are the times of great growth, so get out there and find yourself again. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask.
Lee. Very sorry to hear. You get out and shred. Good for the soul when things are tough. Shred on bikes, skis, whatever… just getting out and doing it helps!
Best of luck – keep your head up. You’ll be on top in no-time.
Brett
Lee,
I can remember when Tracy was there for you (have to learn how to jump somehow) and I know you have always been there for her. The two of you have always been special friends to me and it sorrows me to see this happen.
As far as making it, Big Time, You did that a long time ago!
Petey
Petey!
That was over 13 years ago. I remember visitiing you at Cycle Craft with scabs on my face.
On Tracy and my third date I was trying to impress her on a big jump (but I didn’t know how to jump). I landed on my face and got a huge concussion. She guided me to the truck and drove me to the hospital.
On the drive she asked, “Do you remember me? Do you remember the past two weeks?”
“No,” I said. “Are we doing it?”
She said, “Not yet.”
That apparently got me excited, and in a concussed state I told everyone at the hospital I had an erection. With the Lycra that was probably obvious.
Good times.
Hey Lee,
Been there. Seems so hard when it’s happening – like you wonder if you will survive.
I took delivery of a brand new Harley “dresser” the day I moved out and spent the next year on the road – meditating to the drone of that bike while healing my soul. When I returned, there was a message on my answering machine from a dear friend. I’m now married to her – 14 years.
You just never know where it’s going to take you. I know, (cliche away) but it’s all about the journey.
Thinking about you…
X
Thanks man.
Makes me think: Spend a year in the Sprinter … riding, teaching clinics and spreading the love …
Lee,
I am deeply sorry to hear what’s going on with you and your wife. I will pray for you!
wow lee – that’s sad. One of the things I thought was so cool about you was how well you spoke of your wife and how much respect you have for her. so to care about someone that much and not have it work out – it IS tragic.
In regards to “big time” – in my book you hit the big time when you took the risk to quit a job that wasn’t good for you and to do what you love. that takes some big balls, determination, confidence and perservence. I know a TON of people that “want” to do what you did but never take any action in that direction. you always seem to lay everything out on the line and give it everything you got. you totally rock lee.
cynthia
ps. man! i hope you don’t leave boulder – i need you to teach me how to jump next spring!
Whatever you do, don’t level that PUMP TRACK. Talk about a selling feature for the house. If the buyers have kids they’d be stoked!!
Seriously.
You should have seen the real estate agent’s face when he saw the back yard … “uuuhhhh … uuuuhhhhhhh …”
I pray someone wants the track. Otherwise it’s gonna be a sad Last Ever Pump Track Worlds.
Lee,
Hate to hear the bad news. It’s a tough time, I know, and like others have said, hang in there man, it gets better. Hold true to you.